When kids are born they only have instinct and everything they learn they learn from the world around them. One major way kids learn is though pattern. So, if a child sees someone doing something everyday, it is normal. This applies to anything from smoking, to eating, to fighting, to mopping. Doing an action repeatedly indicates that one wants to do the action, even if the opposite message is given verbally. There are, of course, many aspects to wanting to do something, but doing it over and over indicates that a desire is there.
If a child sees a parent mopping every day, even if that parent complains, and especially if the parent does not, the child assumes the parent wants to do this action. Now, as adults we know that you are probably mopping because you have a desire to have a clean house and have a healthy family, not because the action is immensely joyful. However, given that a small child does not understand this difference, it is assumed that you want to do it and since you are doing it over and over, it is your job. When the child grows older, this task has seemingly been yours for years and you keep doing it of your own accord, so you doing this task is normal and expected.
It is a lot like giving dogs treats. If you give a dog a treat occasionally and randomly, it is very excited and grateful. If you give a dog a treat at set intervals and then fail to provide, the dog becomes confused and demanding. Through your decision to act repetitiously you have established it as your job that you want to do and it becomes normal and expected. The same goes for kids and housework. If you do the housework for them and then ask them to do it, it is confusing. “Why bother, isn’t it your job?” they might wonder. You have to transition the child into accepting responsibility. You also have to understand that the child will not thank you graciously for doing the thing you have always been doing. It does not seem special and worthy of praise, because it seems normal.
For example, I started putting candy out at work. After a few weeks, I ran out. Someone asked me when I would be getting more candy. I was not thanked, because the expectation was that now it was my job to provide candy and I had failed at my job. The thought was not that I had gone out of my way to do something nice.
So, what’s the point? If you see someone doing something you wouldn’t want to do, but benefits you, say thank you. Also, remember Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and birthdays, because they are the one time a year where you are reminded to say “thank you” for all of the things you take for granted, so don’t forget. And, well, thanks Mom, you know, for mopping and such.
